The Mass

Today, I heard a mass in the most memorable church of my love life. This is the very church I first entered with my first guy. The very church where I promised that I would take care of the person beside me. And the very church that I took refuge to when I felt lonely the most. But today, I felt fearless and light-headed when I stepped into its tiled floor thinking that I should seek forgiveness from God, the only being I'm accountable to...


It came in like a surprise when the homily was about the "happiness" of the life we're leading to. Of all the places I would be preached of the most evasive but fulfilling happiness, I would get it from the place where I laid my happiness a long time ago. The priest spoke of happiness as if it was contentment. As if it was success in life. As if it was heaven. But he took it back by saying that life might squeeze us so that all that will be left is hate and sadness. It's our decision then if we seek for that sweet revenge or drink the "nutritious" juice of happiness back again.


My favorite part of that homily was "We are unhappy because of what we've done to ourselves only, nothing else."